Vincent S. Pepe

9/24/09

I sit here waiting for a day that will never come

For the day you will walk through that door and tell me “Hon, your still the one”

I look for signs that you are near

Really what I need is you lying beside me right here

Life seems to be going by so fast but yet so slow

I’m driving around for hours without any place to go

The emptiness I feel makes everything so gloomy

It takes everything left inside me to not let it consume me

As the tears stream down my face

That voice inside my head screams “This is what you wanted, you need a little space”

All I wanted was for us to stop fighting and for you to be well

Instead I helped you to die – for this I will burn ALONE in hell

9/19/09

Vin -

I read these quotes and poems about how other people feel. I don't know why I cannot put into words how I feel. 11 years ago tonight we had our first date. I can't believe that so much time has passed. You always remembered these important dates. It is so funny how you never forgot. Well I can promise that no matter where I go in life I will never forget you or us. I am forever bound to you with my heart and soul. I still can't wait to see you. I miss you so much. I love you - Now and Forever XXOO.

9/13/09

When I cry at night, the only thing I can think to myself is...how can I seem so---perfectly fine in the morning.  Why do I smile like nothing is wrong?  And how does not one single person notice that I'm not okay?

I don't know what I want in life.  I don't know what I want right now.  All I know is that I'm hurting so much inside that it's eating me, and one day, there won't be any more of me left. 

Teardrops slowly fall from my eyes as I look to the sky, and I question how come life keeps passing me right on by.  I just wonder why I can't escape, is this my fate?  To always be unhappy and how much longer must I wait...

9/5/09

Hi Vin -

Had that dreaded Labor Day party today. It just wasn't right without you. It makes me want to die to be without you and after all this time it is still no different. I did however see you... if it was really you. That beautiful butterfly that flew right into my lap almost touching me but not quite. I saw it twice that day, it came right to me both times which made me speachless. I reached out to touch it but I didn't want to ruin it. I am just going to stay believing it was you.

I miss you. I love you forever always..

XXOO