Vincent S. Pepe

12/12/09

Vin -

Its been 19 months 8 days to the hour since the day you left me. All I have to say is that it fucken sucks and does not get any better. Tomorrow it will be a year that my friend Sal lost his best friend... I want to tell him that it isnt going to get easier, that it is still gonna suck, and that no matter what nothing is ever gonna be the same. I know this because I lost my best friend, my love, and my heart and soul when you left me. I'm still so angry, still so miserable still so fucken alone. I hope he can find some peace because I still haven't. I can't talk to anyone there is no one left who really give a shit about me or what I am saying half the time, and the other half i just dont know.

I love you and I can't say it enough.

XXOO

12/11/09

Feel asleep for about an hour and a half. Had a dream it was silly but you were there. Mom and I were at the store and she went to get me a sprite zero and minutes went by and you came into the store came up to me and said "Let me ask you something" then I woke up. What is it you want to know my love?

I love you

XXOO

12/3/09

Hi Vin

Well it has happened again with these stupid jobs.  I work too hard for nothing. I really need help trying to determine what to do next. I wish you were here - you would tell me what to do. I miss you so much.

Luv FF

XXOO

12/2/09

Hi Vin

Still missing you so much. The days aren't getting any easier. Life is just getting harder by the day and it sucks. I can't even manage to make new friends that aren't shady and sneaky. I hope that is you letting me know that about them.

I wish there was more that I could say to describe how much I miss you. I think about you everyday and look forward to the day - if it ever comes - that we meet again.

Luv you

XX00

11/27/2009

Happy Thanksgiving Vin,

They made me do it. In this house! I didn't want to. We only had one together here and that is how it should stay. I want so badly to just come find you. I wait for you to come and wake me up from this nightmare and tell me it was all just a dream.

All I ever wanted was a minute of my own; now I have an eternity to sit and die alone.