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Stacey
 

Happy Anniversary.

 

10/27/08..Seven years. It is not enough. I’m sorry but it sucks. It’s not the same. I need you here. I want you here. Seven will forever be an unlucky number to me now. Just 7 years of marriage!!. Yes I am lucky to have had that but I want more. I don’t know why I’m still holding on,  For what??  There is nothing now that your gone. I don’t ever want to forget anything. I try to remember anything I can. Maybe if I would have had a chance to say I love you and I am sorry. Please believe that no matter what I always loved you.

 

Seven years ago started off sunny and cold. Everything was a mess from the beginning. Dog hair all over my gown, my limo going to the Westbury County Club instead of Verdi’s of Westbury, the DJ arriving 1 hour late, walking down the isle with no music, the list goes on. When I saw you at the end of that walk, all that other stuff disappeared. Your hands were shaking and I thought the words would never come out of my own mouth. What is funny is that I don’t remember a thing the man said. I remember putting the ring on your finger and you putting it on mine and we kissed and left the room.

 

I will never forget our first dance. The beautiful song you picked for me. I can’t listen to it anymore now that you are not here.  Except today, I will listen every year on our anniversary until I die.  

 

You made me the happiest, proudest, wife.  I never felt as comforted, as safe, or as loved as I did with you. Through all the good and bad times we shared, I truly with all my heart,  can say we both stayed true to each other.

 

Now that I am alone I can’t tell you how you are missed. I hope that you remember today and smile. This day is forever ours. Your death does not end our love. No matter where I go or what I do you are always a part of me. I hope I make you proud. Happy Anniversary my love, my husband, my friend.

 

I love you. Forever & Always yours,

 

 

Stacey

XOXO

Stacey
 

Hi Vin.

 

My patience is gone.  I just can't get my head into work or anything. My heart is still not into anything almost 6 months later. I can't believe your gone. I'm holding on.. holding onto the hope one day you will find your way home. Home to the one who has nothing without you. The one who's life was all about you even if she didn't think so at the time. If you have forgotten the way just ask me.. I will come and get you. I love and miss you now and forever.

 

XOXO

Stacey
 

I 'm falling apart. I am trying to hold onto you. I still see you in my mind. I'm holding onto to all the words you said to me. I hope what I heard is true...

 

When you get to the gates and the angels sing
Go to that place where the church bells ring
You know I'll come runnin'... runnin' to find you

I hope this will happen. I 'm hanging on to the hope this may be true but I just dont know. All I know is I miss you and love you.

 

Stacey
 

I am still here. I haven't forgotten you 23 weeks later. As always work is overwhelming my life but not my heart. That is all for you. I wish I would have held on to us above everything else so you would have enjoyed your time here. I am so sorry.

 

I am still waiting for my sign. I miss you more than words can say. I wish I could touch you again and just talk to you, really talk to you instead of always blowing you off.

 

I know I always said nasty things but I didn't mean it. I thought you were so strong you'd make it through whatever so I took you for granted. It's so hard to except the fact your gone forever.. I am sorry.

 

Another night without you. I miss you my love. XOXO 

Stacey
 

Another day goes by. Nothing new still missing you and waiting for you to come home.  The job that brought us to the place is almost over. I'm not sure how I feel about it except if we didn't come here maybe you would still be here with me.

 

I am so unsure of myself now. There is nothing I want to do. I wanted to do it all with you, family, career, travel the world. I don't care what happens now.

 

I miss you and love you forever. I cherish the time we spent together. Until we meet again. XOXO

 

 

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